Treasures of Tunnel Chatter
written
by
Jeannette Zink
July 24, 2016
I’m losing you … can
you hear me … we are going through a tunnel … hello … hello … ah, there you are
… what did you say … wait, we are going through another tunnel … hello … what
did you say … I thought you said something about ‘hate’ or was it ‘ate’ … here
we go again … talk with you on the other side …
The sad thing about picking up the tunnel conversation on
the “other side” of the tunnel is that it more than likely does not get any
better than the one you were having while "inside" the tunnel. That’s the way of
it with us human type. We really are
very poor listeners and even more challenged in the art of interpreting what we
think we just heard. Why is that, I wonder? Could the answer be entwined with the 24-hour
chatter going on inside our very preoccupied brain? The beauty of our rhythmic, poetic and sometimes prosaic words are continuously being lassoed by the demons we play
company with on a forever looping Ferris wheel of taken the wrong way words, disjointed sentences, or by the short
hand speak of social media.
You have probably seen it, and just decided to ignore the proverbial
“staring-in-your-face” signs … you know, the blank gaze after you have made
what can only be classified as the most profound statement, the disconnected
context in a dialogue exchange, the sudden need to check text messages, the
glance away so as to escape the next spoken words … the signs are always there
for us. The trick is to follow those signs through the next tunnel and come out
the other end with an awareness that the interruption was just a pause not a forever dropped line of communication … end of
conversation … silence, as if our words were chopped apart by a foreboding dark
passageway and never to be mended by that promise of a light at the end of the tunnel.
It occurs to me that perhaps the tunnel chatter is precisely the language we should adopt when faced
with uncomfortable conversations. The phrases … I’m losing you … Can you hear me … What did you say … Wait … Talk
with you on the other side … are the saving grace stop gap words that could
aide our unease in navigating the choppy waters of feelings, emotions and human
interactions … a means to wave a yellow flag and slow down the verbiage train
to avoid the unintended destructive wreck of a conversation. One that may
result in a life-changing relationship detour when years from now this exchange may never be remembered,
but will forever be felt.
The next time I talk the language of tunnel chatter or
experience the frustration of a difficult conversation, I am going to employ
the secrets of tunnels. Hit the pause button until reaching the other side of a
tunnel vision conversation … breathe between tunnels … and pick up my chosen
words on the other side when hopefully the light is shining brighter and my
thoughts are viewed from a clearer perspective – one that takes in to account the
person waiting at the other end of the tunnel chatter. Silence is golden at times, but love and
respect for each other is a lifetime worth of tunnel chatter.
Peace, my kindred spirits.
Travel with love and may you find value in the treasures gained from
tunnel chatter.
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